A Wife of Noble Character
I love days like today! The inexpressible and incessant flow of God's love for us shouts for our wonder in every sunrise, in every gust of wind (even in blistering 95° Florida heat), and in an endless mosaic of displays of his glory everywhere we look. And yet. There are days like today when his overwhelming goodness and relentless desire to flood us with joy crash over us with focused intensity, like high tide over a toddler. On days like today, you can barely stand as your knees want to buckle at the gravity of just how much he adores you.
I'm having one of those days - and it is glorious! Fifteen years ago today, I said, "I do" to my closest friend, my hero, the love of my life, and the woman who would come to etch her impression upon every page of the journal of my dreams and adventures. My Jillian.
I'm so grateful to say that Jill and I never came to understand the people who told us as we got engaged: "Just wait. All the romance and wonder will wear off." So far to the contrary, my love, admiration, respect, and awe only skyrocket every time that princess of God draws another breath. Every day, she invites me to love with a vulnerability previously undiscovered as she captures a new part of my heart I never knew existed. That God would trust me -- ME -- with Jill is staggering. He is a Good, Good Father.
Proverbs 31 paints a beautiful picture that wives around the globe have aspired to reflect for centuries. It also happens to be an incredible description of life with my bride.
"A wife of noble character who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life." Proverbs 31:10-12
Jill was fourteen when we met. I was fifteen. As of today, I have been married to my wife the exact length of time of my entire existence before her. We have shared everything together. Births -- 5 of them! Deaths -- more than I wish to recall. Laughter -- you cannot be around Jill and fail to laugh. She is the funniest person I know. Tears -- we've shared plenty of those, too. I'll be the first to admit, I've done some pretty dumb things. My heart is usually in the right place, but sometimes my foot is in my mouth from something I said (or didn't say). I really do mean well, but have found myself many times on the giving end of an apology. And yet, Jill has always stood for me, not against me. She has always desired the best for me. Never divisive. Refusing to seek revenge or even an "I told you so." She's been the first to believe in me, the first to cheer me on, and the first to lift my head when everything has crashed around me. All she seeks is my good -- never my harm.
"She rises while it is still night and provides food for her household. She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands, she plants a vineyard. She dresses herself with strength and makes her arms strong...strength and dignity are her clothing." Proverbs 31:15-17, 25
With five kids, Jill's nights of interrupted sleep have greatly outnumbered the nights no one came to ask for: medicine, a blanket, comfort from a bad dream, or even to tell her about the latest discovery on a video game (yes, that's happened). She serves and serves and serves. Don't get me wrong. I'm far from a passive husband. I do everything I can to support her, our kids, and our home. But there is still never a shortage of work to be done. "Strength and dignity". Those are fitting words. She is strong enough that she doesn't need to point to her achievements or successes, but there are many. She excelled through college. She conquered grad school (with honors) in a mere 14 months. She works three jobs as a teacher, a pastor, and a homeschool mom -- all because there's so much within her that has to pour out. She cannot sit idle! She is filled with dreams and hope and a supply of energy and drive that makes anyone who knows her stand back in a sense of awe and respect.
"She laughs at the time to come. She opens her mouth with wisdom, and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue. She looks well to the ways of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Her children rise up and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her; 'Many women have done excellently, but you surpass them all.' Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give her of the fruit of her hands, and let her works praise her in the gates." Proverbs 31:25-31
I am convinced my wife's laugh is the most joyous sound on the planet. It's why we have a family full of comedians -- we each want to somehow stir the delight that pours out of her. Anyone who knows Jill quickly sees her wisdom. On our church staff, she has been right at so many critical points, they've nicknamed her "the man!" (which is awkward for oh so many reasons)! And to know Jill is to experience the kindness and compassion of Jesus. She makes you feel like the treasure that God says you are.
There's no way I could be the man I am today without Jill. Time and time again, she has seen treasure beneath the surface in who God made me to be, and she has been used of his Holy Spirit to help mine it out. She's my biggest fan -- and I just happen to also be hers. This goes out to my hero, my friend, my love. Thank you for believing in me, for standing with me -- for being you. "Who can find a wife of noble character?" I'll tell you who -- this guy. And I stand ready to shout it from the rooftops on a day like today!
